Getting Back on Track

I have let myself go for TOO LONG. I'm currently 13 pounds heavier than I should be, and I can feel it.

I remember the day I fit into single-digit size pants; I promised myself I would never go back. Well, I can still wear those pants, but they don't fit well. The worst part is I've fallen into the feel guilty--eat to feel better--feel guilty about eating to feel better-trap. How did I let this happen?

Things need to change, Peeps; I need to change.

With this in mind, I've set some goals for myself.

Goal #1: This is the most important goal. I need to go back to logging my calories. I lost the most weight when I logged into My Fitness Pal, and I was able to maintain that weightloss for a long time. Then I got away from it, and I am in a Pit of Despair.

This is EXACTLY how my Pit of Despair looks. Don't go down there.

What kept me from logging my calories for so long was the idea that I knew I was going to go over my limit, so in my head, I said, "Oh well. No need to log those calories. I'm going to screw up anyway." Well, guess what? Now my rule is that I have to log all calories every day, and I'm not going to beat myself up when I go over my limit. This is a small goal, and for now it is enough to recognize honestly what and how often I am eating. No excuses.

Goal #2: Remember that Hunger is my friend. That's right. This was my mantra when I first lost the weight. Don't get me wrong; I do not deprive myself. I allow myself all the calories right up until the set limit. My problem is that I am constantly hungry. I was that way as a kid, too.  Is this some sort of psychological problem? Maybe, but the solution is the same; I need to remember that it is ok to feel hungry. I don't have to feed myself every time my stomach turns into Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors.



Goal #3: Be patient. It took me over a year to regain this weight. I can take that long to lose it again as long as I keep my eyes on the prize.

Lastly,

Goal #4: Be forgiving. I beat myself up more than any other person can. I have high expectations and when I don't meet them, I punish myself. It's time to love and accept myself. Honestly, this will be the  most difficult goal.

Oddly enough, none of these goals directly involve running, but they will have an incredibly positive effect on my running. If I treat my body and my mind with more respect, both will provide better results than what I've been getting.

What are you struggling with? What will it take for you to treat yourself with love and respect? How is running part of the process?


Hey, pssst.  Are you thinking about signing up for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon, Half Marathon, 10k or Challenge? Have you been following my friends, the Ambassadors, for your chance at a free entry? WHY NOT???? If you aren't crazy about giveaways and you still want to run with me (or waaaayyyy ahead of me, more likely), click here to register for your race(s), and use my code, SICLE10, for a 10% discount!

Pam

Andrew

Jessica

These friends encourage me to be happy with myself while still striving to be a better runner. It's a delicate balance. How's that balance working for you?

Whatever your situation, I hope you run happy, Peeps!

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Long Run on the Dreadmill: It IS Possible!

This week I am learning to tolerate embrace the treadmill.  The temperature has been at or below zero  the whole week, so I have had to run inside.  First of all, let me say that I am grateful that I have a treadmill.  I just bought it for my husband for Christmas, but I have had to start using it.  For those of you who don't have a treadmill or a gym membership, I suggest you run in place in your living room while watching Dr. Who.  That's what I used to do.  Now I run on the treadmill and watch Dr. Who.  I'm on the eleventh Doctor-- how about you?  Really, though, MY Doctor is and always will be Christopher Eccleston.

Who's your Doctor?

This is my Doctor.

I don't care who your Doctor is; this is just funny.

Anyway, even the Doctor can only get me so far on a dreadmill.  I've talked to regular treadmill users, and they've given me some great advice, which I sometimes implement.

Advice #1 (from Elizabeth):  Make every run count.  Don't just decide to "go on the treadmill." Have a reason.  Is it a speed workout?  What about inclines?  Tempo run or intervals?

What I've Done with Advice #1:  Mostly I decide my purpose is to "burn a ton of calories" so I can "eat a ton of food and drink a ton of wine."  Somehow I feel that I've failed at following Elizabeth's advice.

Advice #2 (from Mandy):  Use the treadmill for your speed workouts.  You HAVE to hit your pace or you will fall and hurt yourself.  Did I mention that Mandy is a LOT younger than I am?

What I've Done with Advice #2:  Considering I almost fell off the treadmill today because I simply turned my head to the left a little bit, I'm not so confident that I will always "hit my marks."  Nevertheless, I did experiment this week with different speeds.  I started at 5 for a mile; then, I gradually upped the speed every half or full mile until I got to over 7, and then I moved it back down to 5.5, which felt much easier after running fast for a few miles.

Today, with subzero temps, I couldn't possibly do my long run outside, so I glommed onto Mandy's membership at LA Fitness, where we did a ten mile treadmill run together.  I prepped myself physically by bringing a banana, water bottle, and headphones.  I prepped myself mentally by coming up with strategies to survive every three or four miles: 1) Talk to Mandy whenever possible  2) Listen to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me! or Car Talk on my list of subscribed podcasts 3) Listen to my running playlist, of course.

The really pleasant surprise was that I didn't need to do any of that (well, beyond the talking).  Mandy and I set a goal to run six miles, stop and fuel, and then run four more, and it worked really well.  Kevin showed up to run 5k next to us, and that was a nice change for a while, but really Mandy and I did a great job putting in ten miles.  I can't believe I never even touched my earbuds!

This is EXACTLY how Mandy and I look running on a treadmill for ten miles.  The legs are blurry because we are so darned fast.

Knowing that I CAN do a long run on the treadmill makes a huge difference in the way I see my training for the Rite Aid Cleveland Half Marathon.  I'm still not happy about subzero temperatures, but I will deal with them.  For now.

Speaking of the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon, Peeps, did you know that the CLEmarathon Ambassadors are having race entry giveaways?  Check out the list here; the giveaways have already started.  Get busy!

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Head for the Hills!

Hill training is important, right?

Today I test-ran the course for the Shamrock 15k in Cuyahoga Falls with Shelby and Mandy.  It is EXTREMELY challenging and super-fun.  I signed up for the race in March because I was tempted by a lower race fee, and I realized that I don't have anything on my radar until April 25 (when I run the Pro Football Hall of Fame Gold Jacket 5k in Canton).

Now, keep in mind that when I say "super-fun," I mean, "This course will kick your butt.  You'll gasp, you'll groan, you'll swear a LOT.  You will be glad when it's done."  That's the kind of fun I mean.  I had a lot to say about the race when I ran it in 2013.

This is EXACTLY how I look when I run the Shamrock 15k.  This is my happy look.

Just kidding.  This is EXACTLY how I look when I run the Shamrock 15k.  In freaking 25-degree weather.

The first 5k goes down, down, downhill.  It's fabulous if you don't think about the next 5k, which is the steepest, longest set of hills EVER.  I am used to hill repeats, but this hill is tough.  I have to lean forward and run it on my toes.   Deep down I wanted to walk the hills, but I couldn't let Mandy, who is a damned kid, show me up, especially when we started the ascent and she said, "This isn't so bad."  Shut up.  Actually, I'm glad she and Shelby were there. The great thing about group runs is accountability.  I can't quit because they are watching me, and I'm sure at certain points in the run they are thinking of quitting, too.  Shelby and Mandy, you complete me.  Don't feel too flattered, though, because I say the same thing to my glass of wine at dinner.

So, how will this help me for the Rite Aid Cleveland Half Marathon in May?  I seem to remember a set of hills starting around Mile 10.  If I can continue my practice on that big-ass hill on the Shamrock run, those hills will look like NOTHING to me.  Nothing.  Right.

Do you include hill repeats in your training, or do prefer to run hilly routes regularly?  I like to do both, but I would say I enjoy the hilly routes more.

Until next week. . .Run hilly, Peeps!

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Run Cleveland

In the last two posts I've shared the evaluation of my 2014 running goals, my 2015 running goals, and my running payday.  Today I'd like to elaborate on one of my running goals for 2015, and so I need a fanfare for this one. . .

Hear ye, hear ye!

This year I will be an ambassador for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon!  I'm so excited to be a part of a team of talented runners and bloggers.  Here is the list of the other ambassadors; you should follow them on Twitter, like I do.

Official Ambassadors

• Emily Baumgartner - Blog; @emilyebaum
• Melissa Bixler - Blog; @MBIX66
• Melissa Carney - Blog; @koskim
• Christine Cassar - Blog; @ratherbsweating
• Jessica Corson - Blog; @HealthyHappyCLE

• Joe Fell - Blog; @ClevelandJoe
• Jill Gruenwald - Blog; @Jill_Grun
• Andrew Hettinger - Blog; @andrewrunsalot 
• Jessica Humphrey - Blog; @racingtozen 
• Stephani Itibrout - Blog; @itibrout 
• Jamie Johnston - Blog; Facebook 
• Stephanie Lesco - Blog; @StephPlusFour
• Debi Lantzer - Blog; @DebiL1611
• Jessica McCartney - Blog; @tamburarunner
• Pam McGowan - Blog; @pam_mcgowan

For me, races aren't just about the actual event on that day.  They are a chance to explore the cities and people involved.  Last year I ran the half marathon in Cleveland, and I really loved the way the neighborhoods came out and partied in support of the race.  You can read my post about it here.  This year the course has changed again, and I'm eager to see what that means.  Yes, I know I can read the map on the webpage, but I still can't picture it in my mind.  Last year's half marathon course was super- interesting and fun, so I'm sure that this year will be, too.

Come on; you know you want a piece of this!

When I talk about the people involved in the event, sure, I mean the other ambassadors, but I also mean the people who go through the training experience with me.  I mean you, Peeps!  When I was training for Cleveland last year, I remember talking to runners and walkers who were just as excited as I was to #runCLE.  This year I know that some of my running friends will be making the leap from the half marathon to the full (Amanda, Cassie, Beth).  I'm so happy for them, and I can't wait to learn from their training experiences as we run together. What about you?  I hope to hear from more of you, through the blog and social media and also on the roads and trails.  Share your training with me--let's party together for this one!  Click here to register for the marathon, half marathon, 10k, or 5k.

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Year-End Goal Review

I've been doing a lot of reflecting lately, Peeps.  The weather has been so nice that I've been able to run in the sunshine most days during my Christmas break from school.  One day I even ran in a t-shirt and capris!  During those runs, I've had lots of time to think about what I've been able to accomplish this year and where I fell short.

This is EXACTLY how I look when I am reflecting on my goals.

Let me first say that I feel very, very lucky that I was able to run this year, considering my foot never really healed from the Horrible Nut Incident.  I still have an attitude of gratitude, so don't get mad at me if I gripe a little, too.

2014 Goals:

1.  Run 1,000 miles.  I did it!!!!!  Yay for me!

2.  Run a sub-2 hour half marathon.  Nope.  2:00:52, darn it.  Read about that experience here.

3.  Blog for races.  Nailed it!  I'm so happy about this goal.  This year I was part of Team Panera for the Akron Marathon, I was a guest blogger for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon, and I was a Hot Chocolate Ambassador.  These were fabulous experiences--thank you to my sponsors!

Team Panera, Baby!

4.  Destination race.  Hot Chocolate 15k--Columbus.  Sooo much fun!  Click here to read about it.

Awesome Hot Chocolate swag!

Other than those four goals, I have one more little year-end wrap up to do: pay myself.  I will write about this next week.

Here are my goals for next year:

1.  Run at least 1,100 miles.

2.  Sub-2 hour half marathon:  Akron, I'm looking at you!

3.  Race blogging:  I'm hoping to be back for Akron and the C-bus Hot Chocolate.  I'd like to thank Cleveland Rite Aid Marathon for choosing me as a race ambassador for 2015!  My efforts to arrange an official blogging position with the Medina Half Marathon and the Pro Football Hall of Fame Marathon were not successful last year, but I'm not giving up!  Hey, guys, guys, LOOK AT ME!!!

4.  Extend my longest run to at least 15 miles.  I know this sounds kind of dumb considering I can race 13.1 miles, but we all know that the mental blocks are the hardest to overcome.  I am thinking about signing up for a 30k trail race, but I would have to do the hard training in winter, and honestly, I'm not up for wading streams in the winter, especially if the Polar Vortex kicks in again this year.  So, I'm going to try to increase my mileage on the long run, and I'm going to SLOW DOWN to get there. I'm not ready to put in the time and hard work to run a full marathon until I can run the half in the time I want, so this will be a nice side goal for me.

Peeps, it has been a fabulous year.  Thank you so much for accompanying me on this journey; you make the hard runs easier and the gloomy days brighter.  I am a lucky runner.

I love you, Man.

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What Got Me Started

On Thursday morning I did 45 minutes of  a Tae Bo DVD I had bought about eight years ago.  I was amazed at how good it made me feel--especially in the core area.  As I punched, kicked, and jumped, I asked myself why I haven't been doing more Tae Bo lately. . .and I didn't have an answer.

Oh, Billy, I can't quit you.

I remember clearly the day I called the number from the Tae Bo infomercial.  I had decided that enough was enough.  I was tired of being fat and inactive, and I was tired of fooling myself into believing that I "wasn't that big."  The day my new tapes arrived (yes, they were VHS), I sat down with the first video and a bag of fat-free potato chips and watched it.  On the couch.  No movement, except to put the chip to my mouth.  That's how pathetic I was.

But.

I had paid for these tapes, so I intended to use them, and I did.  Everyday.  At first I thought I would die during thirty minutes of exercise, but gradually I was able to increase my fitness and my skills.  Eventually, through exercise and tracking my food choices, I lost about forty pounds.

This is EXACTLY how I look when I do Tae Bo after losing about forty pounds.

Tae Bo was a gateway drug for me.  I moved on to other challenges:  biking, walking, Bhangra dancing.  I loved all of it, but what I really wanted to do was run.

For nine years, I watched runners on the Blue Line run by my house for the Akron Marathon.  Eventually I had two children, and together we would cheer on the runners going by our house.  Each time a runner passed, and there were SO MANY runners, I was envious.  I wanted to be that strong person who was running so far, so fast.

On the tenth year I decided to do something about my jealousy; I joined the Towpath Turtles.  My original goal was to run a three mile leg of the Akron Marathon, but my newfound running club buddies convinced me that I had what it takes to run the half marathon.  And they were right.

I intend to write about the powerful influence of a running club later; today I want to take it back to what got me started, or more precisely, WHO got me started.

It was you, Billy.  If I hadn't ordered those tapes, if I hadn't stopped eating chips so I could try a jump-kick, I would never have been able to run 8.5 miles for FUN this morning.  I would never have run five half marathons and a gazillion other distances since 2011.  I wouldn't be blogging for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon, an opportunity that excites me since it combines three of my loves: running, Cleveland's funky neighborhoods, and writing.

I look forward to sharing my journey with you.  I promise you that while I may take a few stutter steps now and then, I will NEVER go back to being that person sitting on the couch eating chips and watching exercise videos.  I have gained so much; I intend to continue forward.

This is EXACTLY how I look when I vow to continue to move forward.

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Race Review: Rite Aid Cleveland Half Marathon

Today  I woke up at the ungodly hour of 3:00 am.  Normally when I wake up for a long run on Sundays, I console myself that it's STILL allowing me to get up later than I would for work (I get up at 4:30 am on school days).  Not so today because today was the Rite Aid Cleveland Half Marathon, and because I always worry about getting into the city in time for parking, I had to leave my house by 4:30.  I got a great space in the huge Cleveland Municipal Lot, and I was really happy until a jackelope backed his truck into the next spot SO CLOSELY NEXT TO MINE that I couldn't open my door.  Seriously, Dude?  There were 60,000 spots in that lot; you couldn't skip a space at 5 am?

Anyway, I didn't have any trouble waking up because I was so excited after being at the expo on Friday.  Of course I set out my outfit the night before:

This is EXACTLY how I look when my body isn't in my clothes.

AND my son pasted on a temporary tattoo that I got at the expo:

Let's get to it, shall we?

The Good:  There was a lot of good in this race.  It was well organized, with plenty of port-a-potties.  The course was very interesting, with some funky neighborhoods (I'm looking at you, Tremont and Ohio City!) and some incredibly rich neighborhoods (I'm looking at you, Clifton).  The supporters were really enthusiastic in some places, and the signs were clever.  My two favorite signs were in Tremont.  The first said,  Run like you stole the kishka!  You definitely have to be from Cleveland and/or adore Franky Yankovic to understand this one.  For those of you who are not familiar with Eastern European food or our favorite polka player, check out this version of it:



The second sign is for those of us who have a love/hate relationship with George R.R. Martin.  It said, Hodor like you just Hodor!

Made my day!

Other "goods":  The beer line was better organized this year.  I actually got a beer this year, but because I was so exhausted, I only drank half of it.  I'm so ashamed.

The swag and the medal are awesome:

The Bad:  The pre-race weather was FREAKING COLD and windy, but of course nobody can control for that.  Welcome to Northeast Ohio!  I wore a long-sleeved shirt, but I only brought a gunky towel with me to cover up before the race.  I shivered in the wind off of Lake Erie for an hour and a quarter.  My fault; I really need to start buying throwaway clothing at Goodwill.

Also, although there were plenty of Port-a-Potties, there was no hand sanitizer.  ICK.  'Nuff said.

Lastly, I saw many people trying to pop a GU before the start time, but there was no pre-race water available.  I think it would have helped me since I waited so long after my 3 am breakfast.

The Ugly:  Well, that would be me.

Don't get me wrong:  I think this is a perfectly respectable time considering I have not been able to run 13.1 miles in a year.  Also, this is a respectable time considering I took five months off all cardio and endurance to heal a broken foot.  Every time someone asked me about a time goal, I said that I would be happy to finish the race.  This was a lie; I always have a secret time goal, and this time I dared to hope that I could PR my Medina time (2:12:21).  I know. . .stupid.  The thing is that I think that I COULD have pr'd if I had played this right.  Once again, I set out too quickly, and I was fluctuating back and forth between 9:30 and 10:00 for the first 9 miles (except when I walked through a water stop or fueled).  This was wrong.  I had originally intended to follow the 2:10 pacer, and I didn't follow through.  In fact,  my hubris led me to believe that I would PR the race because I was feeling great until mile 9.  

Mile 10 was difficult because it was a gradual incline.  It didn't really look like a hill to me, but I was already hurting by then, and I noticed that many runners around me had started walking.  I can't walk up a hill; it smells too much like defeat.  Luckily for me, the marathon winner came by on the other side of the highway at that time, so I was able to shuffle up the hill while watching him.  At mile 11, I decided that I would never run another half marathon again, and I wondered why I had thought my two previous half marathons were fun.  At mile 12, the resolve kicked in again, but I knew my body was toast.  I brought the pace back up, but it wasn't enough.

I am happy with this time.  I am.  The question is, What will happen in two weeks at the Medina Half Marathon?  I can't wait to find out. . .

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