Getting Back on Track

I have let myself go for TOO LONG. I'm currently 13 pounds heavier than I should be, and I can feel it.

I remember the day I fit into single-digit size pants; I promised myself I would never go back. Well, I can still wear those pants, but they don't fit well. The worst part is I've fallen into the feel guilty--eat to feel better--feel guilty about eating to feel better-trap. How did I let this happen?

Things need to change, Peeps; I need to change.

With this in mind, I've set some goals for myself.

Goal #1: This is the most important goal. I need to go back to logging my calories. I lost the most weight when I logged into My Fitness Pal, and I was able to maintain that weightloss for a long time. Then I got away from it, and I am in a Pit of Despair.

This is EXACTLY how my Pit of Despair looks. Don't go down there.

What kept me from logging my calories for so long was the idea that I knew I was going to go over my limit, so in my head, I said, "Oh well. No need to log those calories. I'm going to screw up anyway." Well, guess what? Now my rule is that I have to log all calories every day, and I'm not going to beat myself up when I go over my limit. This is a small goal, and for now it is enough to recognize honestly what and how often I am eating. No excuses.

Goal #2: Remember that Hunger is my friend. That's right. This was my mantra when I first lost the weight. Don't get me wrong; I do not deprive myself. I allow myself all the calories right up until the set limit. My problem is that I am constantly hungry. I was that way as a kid, too.  Is this some sort of psychological problem? Maybe, but the solution is the same; I need to remember that it is ok to feel hungry. I don't have to feed myself every time my stomach turns into Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors.



Goal #3: Be patient. It took me over a year to regain this weight. I can take that long to lose it again as long as I keep my eyes on the prize.

Lastly,

Goal #4: Be forgiving. I beat myself up more than any other person can. I have high expectations and when I don't meet them, I punish myself. It's time to love and accept myself. Honestly, this will be the  most difficult goal.

Oddly enough, none of these goals directly involve running, but they will have an incredibly positive effect on my running. If I treat my body and my mind with more respect, both will provide better results than what I've been getting.

What are you struggling with? What will it take for you to treat yourself with love and respect? How is running part of the process?


Hey, pssst.  Are you thinking about signing up for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon, Half Marathon, 10k or Challenge? Have you been following my friends, the Ambassadors, for your chance at a free entry? WHY NOT???? If you aren't crazy about giveaways and you still want to run with me (or waaaayyyy ahead of me, more likely), click here to register for your race(s), and use my code, SICLE10, for a 10% discount!

Pam

Andrew

Jessica

These friends encourage me to be happy with myself while still striving to be a better runner. It's a delicate balance. How's that balance working for you?

Whatever your situation, I hope you run happy, Peeps!

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Learning through Running

The other day Shannon had a four-mile run on her schedule.  I asked her about it when we chatted in the hallway between classes.  "Oh, I didn't go.  I had to drive my kids to practice, and then (voice drops and falters) I went out.  I need to make it up.  Maybe I'll tack it on to today's run."

This is where I stopped her with unsolicited advice because--hey--ME.

"I would not suggest you add mileage to your run tonight, as you haven't established a base yet, and even one more mile would be a significant add-on at this point.  Let it go, learn from it, and move on."

Shannon sometimes suffers from injuries, but today she suffered mostly from guilt, and I would hate for her to hurt herself in an attempt to make up a lost run.  Too often we adhere to a rigid training plan, and when life gets in the way, we beat ourselves up.  Does that mean I should drop a run anytime I don't feel like getting out there?  No.  At this point in my running, I know what my options are when I feel like I need to bail, but it took me a while to figure it out.

I believe the first year of running is a way to learn more about yourself THROUGH running.  The added mileage and endurance is a plus.  When I explained this to Shannon, she asked, "What do you mean?  What do I need to learn?"

Here are some things I learned about myself through running:

1.  How and when I need to eat to have a successful run.  For example, if I run six or fewer miles, I know that I don't need to eat breakfast first.  I can just wake up, chug at least sixteen ounces of water, and lace up.  If I go longer, the rules change.  I need to wake up at least one and one-half hours before I leave, eat a bagel with cream cheese, drink coffee and lots of water, and spend some quality time in the bathroom.  I didn't learn this the first time I ran more than six miles.  It took me a good year to figure it out through trial and error.

Mmmm.  Food of the gods.  Except I definitely need cream cheese, and that coffee needs some Thin Mints creamer.

2.  Water is non-negotiable.  I HAVE to drink at least six 8-oz. glasses of water a day, more if I'm running.  If I run more than five miles, I have to carry my water with me or run where there are drinking fountains.  The pre-run hydration is the most important part for me, though.  Not drinking enough before a run is a bonk waiting to happen.

My favorite beverage.  I even like it more than I like wine!

3.  When I should run.  When I first started running, I ran with my friend Deidre after work.  Because we were both always so tired, both physically and psychologically, we rarely had good runs, and we were rarely able to push ourselves as much as we should have.  I have learned that with very few exceptions, I can't have a good run when I've been teaching all day.  It just doesn't recharge me, and my chances of bonking increase exponentially.  On the other hand, if I run in the morning, even as early as 4:30, I've set myself up for success.  My mood improves dramatically, and the runner's high carries me through the day.

Wake up!  It's time to run!

4.  How much sleep I need.  I've learned that I function just fine on very little sleep for short periods of time.  This means that if I whine to myself that I'm too tired to get up at 4:30 to run, I have to tell myself to suck it up and run.  I am not allowed to use lack of sleep as an excuse.

5.  When asked to try something new, my first response will be "No."  You should ignore this response because I will do said new thing anyway.  I don't know why I do this; I think I just don't like people to tell me what to do, even if it's something I want to do anyway.  I learned this from my running coach, who does a great job of ignoring me when I bitch and moan or even just say no.

6. My most efficient running weight.  I'm still trying to figure this one out.  This year I've lost about twenty pounds, and it's had a dramatic effect on my pace.  I've got to figure out how to balance my need to eat and drink everything I see with my desire to hit certain paces.

How much weight do I have to lose to get a PR?

7.  I am my biggest driver and harshest critic.  Nobody has higher expectations for me than me.  I have long-term goals, short-term goals that lead to the long-term goals, and secret goals.  I have tests that I give myself to see if I'm going to hit my marks.  I punish myself if I don't make it.  Sometimes I have to do a check-in with my coach to make sure I'm not being too hard on myself.  Sometimes I need to "fail" in order to get a reality check.  It's funny because I don't have impossible aspirations; for the most part I know that I am a middle of the pack runner, but I want to be the best middle of the pack runner I can be.

Everything I have learned so far doesn't just apply to running; it applies to ME and the way I live.  It is extremely valuable information, and it has taken me three years to get this far.  I'm excited about what I can learn in the running years to come.

This is the third week for the Towpath Turtles, our new runner group, and I can't wait to meet all of you on future runs.  The advice I have for you is the same advice I gave Shannon:  Take this time to learn about yourself through running.  You won't regret it.

Run happy, Turtles!

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